Five Fur Friday #4 RANSOM Readers Choice

Hello loyal readers! Bark Kent here again with Five Fur Friday. This week we have a new dog on the block. She may only be fairly new to the dog blogging world but this girl has made an impact! That's right... It's the straight talking girl RANSOM.

Bark Kent: Hi Ransom! Thank you fur taking the time to bark with me today. I am furry sorry that I have been so unorganized this week and fur the short notice with your interview. I should never have over looked the one and only Ransom!

Ransom: That's quite all right! The suspense of waiting all week to find out if I had been chosen or not probably helped sharpen my already keen observation skills! And that is very important when you are head of security!

Bark Kent: I have kept you waiting long enough, so lets get straight into it. I'm sure my readers are dying to know more about you... I understand you were recently kept imprisoned fur weeks! Can you tell us what happened and how it has affected you?

Ransom: Yes. It was a horrific ordeal. I was only sprung yesterday evening! I have the unfortunate lot in life to be stuck with a control freak Spokeswoman. I knew I was in trouble when she color coded the three small, but deceptively fierce, Ninjas that I live with. Then, about three weeks ago she looked at me and declared, "Oh my, Ransom! You're in season," and with those two short sentences began my long ordeal of being confined inside the privacy fence, utterly deprived of all access to the outside world. Day after day I languished...alone and abandoned. Well, almost alone. Actually it would have been BETTER to have BEEN ALONE. Instead, I was cooped up with a manic, psychotic, little Border Collie possessed by a Napoleonic complex and a lazy, delusional, overgrown, perceptually-impaired Newfoundland. As you have probably guessed by now, Bark, a major portion of my day to day job involves keeping those two desperately dysfunctional dogs in line and out of trouble!

Bark Kent: On first impressions most people would assume you are a German Shepherd, but in actual fact you are a Mexican-Chinese Shepherd. Would you please explain to my readers who may not be aware, exactly what the difference is between the two?

Ransom: Well, my papers list me as a German Shepherd, but, in fact, my mother was from Mexico. She had just arrived with her shiny new green card, hardly speaking any English at all when she met my dad and fell madly in love. He had been an undercover cop, but nearly died during his last assignment after his cover was blown. (He had been posing a body guard to drug king pin). Dad was convalescing from his brush with death when his path crossed Mom's. He was utterly, instantly, irrevocably smitten. Sounds like the stuff fairy tales are made of! You might be thinking, "Ahhh...and they lived happily ever after!" But, you would be totally wrong! Mom had a free spirit, an iron will and a fiery temperament. Dad was equally uncompromising and more than a little addicted to adrenalin. His life was his work...so, it isn't any wonder that as he regained his strength he began to feel restless. And, Mom, for her part, began to feel trapped, being saddled with nine puppies. So it is really no surprise at all that even though their love for each other burned fiercely, they had none-the-less gone their separate ways before myself and my eight siblings were more than a few weeks old. Dad's life was his work and Mom just never was the motherly type, so we nine pups all set out on our own pretty early. I was merely six weeks old when I hooked up with the three small Ninjas. Being raised by CHINESE Ninjas left it's mark on me. Hispanic blood courses through my veins, but the three Chinese Ninjas have etched their mark on my heart and soul. So, that's how I came to be a Mexican-Chinese Shepherd.

Bark Kent: I have to ask... You have a furry rocky relationship with your sister Gabby, how is her moving to Alaska going to affect you?

Ransom: It will utterly DEVASTATE me. She's the only dog I've ever been able to goad into a really good fight. The two backyard dogs where I live now are mildly entertaining in their eccentricities, lack of social skills, and over all aberrant behavior, but neither of them can hold a candle to Gabby when it comes to a good old fashioned BRAWL. My dearest memory is the fight when she notched my ear! Her Spokeswoman was horrified, but I was rather pleased with the result...gives me more of a coyote look! And nothing has ever released stress for me quite like sinking my teeth into Gabby's vain little throat. I don't know what I will do without her. It breaks my heart to think that in just three short weeks she is going to be so far away. Also, I am just worried sick because she isn't very bright (have you ever SEEN her SPELLING?). I'm not sure she can make it on her own. I've always been around, in the past, to bail her out of the tight spots she gets in. When she got slapped into prison up in Kansas City for illegal digging, I was the one who came up with an escape plan for her. I suggested she give a sob story to our gullible brother, Vader. It worked! He let her hide out at his place down in the Ozarks for several weeks. She'd still be there, living the good life, if she hadn't messed up and tried treating Vader like she has always treated me. I mean, I'm in top physical condition...there isn't anything Gabby can throw at me that I can't handle with one paw tied behind my back...but, our brother...that is a different matter. He always was a couch potato. While I have been working out daily with the three Ninjas, Vader has just been lazing in the sun with his head buried in his food dish! Gabby, gave him a good working over and the wimp wound up limping and gimping so much that his Spokesperson threw Gabby out on her pretty little ear. So, now, she's back up in Kansas City waiting on her airline ticket to Alaska.

Bark Kent: Who was the first pup to bark on your blog and do you still bark with them today?

Ransom: Why it was Khyra The Siberian Husky , of course, on Valentine's Day of this year! I started blogging when I was eight months old, so I've been at it nearly two months now and, obviously, in that long of time pups have come and gone and many are long forgotten...but Khyra has STAYING power! That Husky is amazing. Sometimes she has already commented on a post before I've even hit the "publish" button! I've never met her in person, but I know I'd like her a lot!

Bark Kent: And finally, the million dollar question... Ev-furry pup that has visited your blog knows just how much you love the ninjas, but if you could only choose one of them to spend an entire month alone with, who would it be and why?

Ransom: Wow! That IS a million dollar question. I have such an naturally analytical brain that it is almost impossible to stump me, but I think you might have done just that Bark! The three Ninjas are all so very different from each other and I love them all differently, but every bit as fiercely. Littlest Ninja is REALLY bossy, but, on the other hand, she is loads of fun and she has the best sense of humor of the three of them. Almost everything that I think is fun, she thinks is fun, too. And she can run like the wind! Like I said, though, she's awfully LITTLE. I'd be worried NOT to take her, because if I wasn't around, who would protect her? Then there is the Medium Sized Ninja. He is really cool! He likes to play rough and get dirty and he NEVER gets tired or slows down. He's got incredible stamina! He and I just speak the same language. He needs me as much as Littlest Ninja does. Then Oldest Ninja is awesome. She has taught me nearly everything I know, but she isn't nearly finished with me yet. Taking a month out of my Ninja mentoring would really set me a long ways back. I mean, she has SO MUCH left to teach me. She is a incredible pole vaulter and just this morning she was telling me she was going to teach me how to jump higher, too. Right now, I can snatch my flying rabbit from a tree branch seven and a half feet off the ground, which isn't too shabby...but, Oldest Ninja is convinced that I haven't yet even begun to reach my full potential. It would be quite handy to be able to scale the privacy fence! Bark, I don't think I could leave any one of the three behind, let alone TWO of them, for an entire month. I need them almost as much as they need me...all THREE of them!!!

Bark Kent: Thank you furry much fur your time today Ransom. I just love your straight talking attitude!

Ransom: Well, Bark, thank YOU for giving me the opportunity to be interviewed by you. It has been a genuine honor. I have followed your interviews from the beginning (clear back to the Snuggle Puggle interview) and have consistently been amazed at your interviewing prowess! To be interviewed by THE BARK KENT has been totally awesome! I hope it is okay that I have given such succinct answers to your five burning questions. I know you would have liked for me to go into far more detail, but I felt like I should keep it short and to the point. After all, I wasn't sure how long you had before your mom and Scooby would once more appropriate your computer! Speaking of Scooby...I went on his Single's Site (not for ME, of course! I already have the Dashing Dexter!)...anyway, I nosed around his spot in cyberspace pretty thoroughly and thought I had found the perfect way to get rid of the psychotic, little Border Collie that just doesn't know when to LEAVE my backyard. I tried hooking her up with one of Scooby's singles, Ludo, a dashing Sheltie who (MOST IMPORTANTLY!) lives on a DIFFERENT CONTINENT!!! I even, self-lessly, offered to raise her airfare and everything, so theirs would not have to be a long distance relationship. But, sadly, Ludo was not interested in taking my psychotic little side-kick off my hands. Oh well....

Bark Kent: Well loyal pups, if you haven't yet visited Ransom's blog you should stop by. Also, please take a moment to check out Suzuki's previous post about the passing of "Little Man" today. Until next time, this is Bark Kent signing out!